Monday, October 10, 2005

THESE THINGS ALSO SUCK LOTTS

My Cali Editor informs me that Culottes (right) are big thereabouts this Fall with the back-to-college set. I have seen me some here in NYC, and frankly they just confuse the pants off of me. Women: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING TO YOURSELVES?

15 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have seen these on my campus. Very strange indeed.

I have to say, one of the great things about being a professor is that no one expects you to be in style anyway. As if I'd wear capri pants on a bet.

10:18 AM  
Blogger A said...

dude. these are gauchos.



i'm just saying.

10:35 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

they are indeed gauchos. which makes them worse ... even the name is ugly.

9:15 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

But capri pants by another name are just as ugly.

1:20 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

8 of my students were wearing gauchos today. I did not say, you'll notice, "8 of my FEMALE students were..." because one of them was, my God, a male. In gauchos. Yes, I guess I'm sexist. Get over it. One of the ladies had donned her gauchos with a lovely silver sequined tube-top. I nigh unto swallowed my tongue with despair.

And of course other assorted college students were wearing capri pants (or as I like to call them "punishment for the aesthetically abled").

I should fail them all for demonstrating stupidity above and beyond the call of student duty.

2:22 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Those things are guaranteed to make your ass look huge.

In addition to being ugly.

8:21 PM  
Blogger Maulleigh said...

I would have "warmed up" those legs about 25,000% with a little photoshop. Ick. It's like she went shopping for her spring clothes in January and there was an unseasonably warm day in February. Yuck.

1:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i, indeed, have fallen victim to gauchos. but they're sooo comfy, and i have no ass so it actually helps me out...

5:13 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

yup. these are indeed, mysterybreeches, these gauchos. Contrary to the statement above, they don't give the appearance of large hind quarters, but rather "wide load" hind quarters. But it is refreshing (no, really) to see women don a fashion with zero regard for impressing the opposite sex. I thought that was the locked domain of dudes trying to look rugged in carhartt and other dudes who wear...well, capris, though in nyc you'll notice that most of those guys are European tourists. Saw a whole fam capri-mugged at 35th St & 5th yesterday: mom, pops, son, daughter all looking up the side of the empire state saying "'zat really it?"

11:31 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Copyranter,

We are kindred spirits. With the exception of the genocide in Darfar and the scourge of AIDS, there is nothing worse that a woman in capri pants. While I typically think blog entries are indicative of a useless existence with WAY TOO MUCH time on ones' hands, I find your blogspot an asset to the world and I hope that every woman who considers the purchase of "sucklots" think again. You have done a great service for your country, and I salute you, sir.

Your friend forever,

Mr. Grey

11:43 AM  
Blogger Mz. Choize said...

Two snaps in circle formation....hated it!!!

10:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I could not agree more! I fucking HATE gauchos, culottes, whatever they are, they are ugly as fuck. I also hate the word comfy, so go out and buy yourself a pair of these pants and some crocs, and then wait for me to shoot you in the face. ASS.
This is one of my favorite sites by the way! Fucking BRILLIANT! :)

9:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Accessorize with flip-flops, for that *extra* nasty, "I just rolled out of bed and didn't have time to get dressed, or shower" or "I just walked through 10inches of mud and horseshit" look. Back in "my day", people who looked like this were usually gross and stinky, for the above reasons.

No one suffered from the delusion that they were looking good this way. I still can't help automaticly hold my breath sometimes when I see 'em coming. BTW thank you for this site! Its good to know I'm not alone in my hate!o

1:46 AM  
Anonymous Keep Gauchos in the Seventies said...

Umm. I must 'fess up: I still miss my vintage, side-zip, Fifties pedal-pushers.

But...I loathe these things. They are yogapris. There are two yoga "studios" near my flat in SF, and as if the smug, zoned-out yogi-wannabes were not irksome enough, milling around and blocking the sidewalk like over-Xanaxed human versions of Prius/Volvo drivers, now they have to accessorize their overpriced backpacks (with the special section for their overpriced yoga mats) with these sartorial atrocities.

I ask you, what is next? Please, oh please, tell me that there is not some misogynist designer out there plotting the day when harempris/MC Hammerpris will take the world by storm.

p.s. I like Priuses (Pria?) and Volvos. I blame only the drivers.

12:26 AM  
Blogger Pasadena Adjacent said...

I wear them and I have an ass the size of a barn. I just don't give a dam what you think

2:11 PM  

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